Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Torture


I went to the dentist today and it was horrible.  No cavities, just tartar buildup, which I know is a fun topic to read about.  Scrape scrape scrape scrape for 45 minutes.  It was like I was a captured spy and the enemy was trying to motivate me to give information.  I would've spilled the secrets if I had any. 

"Have you thought about a Sonicare toothbrush?  Do you floss?  What about Listerine?"

"Fuh you!" is what it would've sounded like with my mouth full of her torture devices, but instead I said nothing.  I use all that crap.  She described my entire regimen.  Later I told her, and she tilted her head and said, "Ohhh," like I was an adorable puppy.

I will lie to my children.  "Hey kids, I went to the dentist today, and it was super fun!  The nice lady tickled Daddy's teeth!  And she counted all of them!"

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